I AM SO MAD

For those of you who are just beginning this wonderful process, here we can narrow down the symptoms and ask questions like "am I starting perimenopause?"

I AM SO MAD

Postby wildwoman » Mon Jan 31, 2005 3:58 am

Is is normal to get so mad all the time? Its like I am standing across the room from me looking at this "wild woman" yelling senseless things at her children. I dont even really believe half of what I say. I just hear myself saying such stupid things. If I wasnt so mad, I would feel sorry for myself.... I just am so mad! Rage, Rage Rage.

I am on the estrogen patch, the .5 mil. Tonight, after yelling at my son's and making a scene out of NOTHING, I put another one on. I have noticed they arent working like they used to. I say used to, but I really only started them about a month ago and have only waited the full week before changing to a new one about once. (Because I was getting angry again) lately the hot flashes are back, crying, sleeping with the fan going in the window, ect. ( My first clue that perhaps the patch wasnt cutting it was when I wanted to cry while watching the Ashley Simpson show after hearing she sold a million c.d.s! OMG!!! LOL) Does this ever go away? Will my children ever really love me again?

I really need some help getting this anger thing in check. I started exercising and hopefully will keep that up. Anybody else going through the anger? What are you doing for it?
Anybody else on the patch? Does it work at .5 mil?
wildwoman
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Postby wildwoman » Mon Jan 31, 2005 3:48 pm

Okay,
Estrogen kicked in. Im better. Breathing slowly, relaxed. My kids are talking to me again. I think I need to talk to Doc about adjusting estrogen. Need to learn the signs of it not working and do something about it quicker. I hate to be mean! I love my children more than anything in this world and what they think of me matters. Im just so afraid Im going to say something so mean, they wont be able to forgive me. I dont want to alienate them because of a hormone. I know the difference between being a mom and being a monster. I know being a Mom means saying NO sometimes. Im fine with that. I just really hate menopause. I hate that its taking my last few years with my kids and making it hard for them to love me. I worked so hard on being a good Mom and estrogen is throwing it all out the window.

Ok, Im rambling, I need to go read the funny memo moments again. They are so good!


Was I yelling in my last post? Didnt mean to be. Sorry. :?

WW :D
wildwoman
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Postby scottie » Tue Feb 01, 2005 8:58 am

Hi WW-

You don't mention the ages of your kids, but if they are adolescents you probably have a household of hormones. :) I have several teens so I can relate to this. I don't deal with anger as much as weepiness. On some days EVERYTHING is sad! :roll:

I hope you can find something that works for you. I only tried the patch once. It felt like I was wearing duct tape with sticky edges. Too gooey for me! The Estradiol pill seems to be ok for me right now. Hope you have a better day today!

scottie
scottie
 

Postby pamibe » Tue Feb 01, 2005 9:50 am

I did go through the rages, but they swung so wildly with the weeps that I could hardly keep up with myself! My husband used to hide from me! :lol:

I used progesterone cream and it really did help, but everyone is different... :wink:


pam
pamibe
 

Postby wildwoman » Tue Feb 01, 2005 10:55 am

Hi Scot and Pam,

I forgot to mention that between the anger I was crying because I was so mean! LOL I talked with my kids, who will be 16 next month, so yes, there are hormones in the house! My kids told me I wasnt as bad as I thought I was. I went from hardly ever being angry with them to this. We will get through this though. We have always had a good relationship and do talk to each other. They know whats going on.
I think I made it sound worse than it really was.

Ya know, my husband has been working a ton of O.T. lately. I wonder if he isnt hiding from me also! :lol:

I know what you mean about the duct tape! Sticky! I did call the Doc yesterday and she will get back to me. I also woke up this morning with a cold, which also means, that perhaps I just wasnt feeling well and didnt allow myself to take it easy thinking it was hormones and I should fight my way through it. Im kind of hard on myself too.

I also worked out a plan with my boys that when Im feeling that way, the most important thing isnt that I finish dinner or whatever Im doing, I am going to just let them finish and Im going for a time out. (to my room and read or watch t.v.) Its more important to me to keep my mouth shut than to fix a dinner. Or as my son said, "Mom, we can burn it just fine too" hehehe Yeah I burnt the dinner. :oops:

Yesterday was a great day, today Im sure will be even better! Hope you two are also having a good one!
WW
wildwoman
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Postby scottie » Tue Feb 01, 2005 3:08 pm

"Or as my son said, "Mom, we can burn it just fine too" hehehe Yeah I burnt the dinner. "

This cracked me up! Last week I got on a baking kick and made some of those chocolate chip pan cookies. Well, I left them in so long that the entire pan was hard as a rock. Everyone chiseled away at them, but finally I told one of my boys to throw the thing away. He took the pan over to the trash can and the entire slab of chocolate chip cement slid away in one piece. :lol:

scottie
scottie
 

Postby wildwoman » Tue Feb 01, 2005 3:18 pm

Scottie

LOL at your cookies! thanks for sharing that. :D

How old are your boys? How many kids do you have?

Mine are 15 (going on 30) but will be 16 next month. They are our only children and are fraternal twin boys. They are really terrific kids. Im so proud of them. They keep me on my toes, or should I say, the girls that call here and come over do! I was never so aggressive as these girls are now. Wow!
wildwoman
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Postby scottie » Tue Feb 01, 2005 3:20 pm

I have 5 kids (teens and up) and they are a blessing, but boy, oh, boy, the baby years were a breeze by comparison. :)

scottie
scottie
 

Postby wildwoman » Tue Feb 01, 2005 3:34 pm

Five?!! Youre like Mrs Walton from the Waltons!! Cool! I wouldve loved to have more but it wasnt to be. You have my respect Scottie!!
wildwoman
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Postby Zero » Tue Feb 01, 2005 6:05 pm

You know what, Girls? If you print out some of the cartoons I think it will show your kids that having a sense of humor about all this is going to help. It can also help educate your families about some of the things that MIGHT flare up, even if it's not happening right now so they'll be more prepared and will recognize the new symptoms before YOU even do. :) I guess I'd better get my book done that will help families to know what to expect, huh? :)
Zero
 

Postby wildwoman » Tue Feb 01, 2005 6:48 pm

Hi Dee,

Great idea! My kids are wonderful but knowledge is power!

If i get emotional when one of their friends are over, I hear them say, "Dont worry about her, her estrogen patch fell off!" :lol: :lol:

They crack me up.

WW
wildwoman
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Postby scottie » Tue Feb 01, 2005 8:32 pm

We don't do that "Night, John Boy" thing, though. :)

I have to laugh at your username. Some days when my hair is kind of crazy I say, "I look like a wild woman!"

scottie
scottie
 

Postby wildwoman » Tue Feb 01, 2005 11:56 pm

have to laugh at your username. Some days when my hair is kind of crazy I say, "I look like a wild woman!"


i cant figure out that quote thingy.....

anyway, I did sign up on one of my "off" days, so the name totally fit me at that time! Today if I signed up it might be "bloated woman" lol

Going to go watch American Idol.

NITE SCOTTIE! :D [/quote]
wildwoman
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Postby scottie » Wed Feb 02, 2005 1:44 pm

"I did sign up on one of my "off" days".


Are there any other kind? :lol:

scottie
scottie
 

Postby wildwoman » Wed Feb 02, 2005 4:27 pm

Good point! :lol: [/img]
wildwoman
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Posts: 42
Joined: Mon Jan 31, 2005 2:23 am

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