I need support and encouragement. PLEASE please help me!

For those of you who are just beginning this wonderful process, here we can narrow down the symptoms and ask questions like "am I starting perimenopause?"

I need support and encouragement. PLEASE please help me!

Postby susnam » Sun Feb 27, 2005 12:15 pm

I just posted a note under "New to perimenopause and sad" and it is loooong. I realize everybody may not have the time or energy to read it, so in a nutshell...

Out of the blue, I got hit with several perimenopause symptoms last week. The worst is that I feel like I'm losing my mind and even friends are telling me that they are going to stay away now. My fiance is breaking up with me. I have never felt more scared in my life, more alone, nor more sad. (I am most sad due to losing friends and fiance, and being in perimenopause. My sadness isn't entirely hormonal.)

Saw my doc... said she can't treat me with hormones due to pre-existing medical conditions. She told me to embrace the changes and learn to live with them like women have done for thousands of years.

I need any help, support, encouragement, and prayers that you can spare.


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Postby Guest » Sun Feb 27, 2005 1:55 pm

You are NOT ALONE!!! First don't stop at just one doc, shop around ask friends but don't just cave in. There are things that can be done to help with a lot of symptoms. Share this site with your friends and fiance and ask for their help (one of my biggest problems is being able to ask for help), let them know you're being proactive in trying to get a grip on this time in your life. DON"T give up!!!!Check your library and online, find a more holistic doc, try to exercise (releases endorphins), treat yourself well, don't beat up on yourself (there's plenty of people that are willing to do that for you so stop it!), treat yourself to a massage.

And check in frequently!! We care!
Hugs Pam

Postby cin-d-rella » Mon Feb 28, 2005 5:19 am

Dear Susan,

Take heart....there are many of us here who are in similar situations. We feel for you, for sure. I am headed off to bed right now (3:15 a.m., my time....hope I can sleep :shock: ) and will DEFINITELY BE PRAYING FOR YOU !!

BTW......I find if I sleep semi-upright, I don't have night sweats ???? I have NO idea why this is, but just figured it out now. Hmmmm.

Anyway, I'll be praying and hope your days and weeks get better. God is in control.
Love Peri-Pauzer.......Cin-d-rella. (Winnipeg, Canada.....still not cold enough to prevent night sweats and hot flashes !!) :wink:
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Postby pamibe » Mon Feb 28, 2005 9:50 am

Susan, I'd also seek out another doctor... Not a case of finding someone until you hear what you want, but rather finding someone who can HELP! Maybe a homeopathic specialist in your area? Herb specialist? Compounding pharmacist?

It's easy for someone else to say "embrace the changes" but when you're having a panic attack alone at 3:00am and think you're losing your mind... well, that's the kind of thing that drives us even crazier, thinking there's no help!

Good luck on your quest for another doctor (which is the route I'd take) and know that we are praying for you!


Postby Guest » Tue Mar 15, 2005 10:18 pm

I have read a number of people suggesting I find a new doctor. I would like nothing better, but how do you go about that? I have asked everybody I know for suggestions and nobody seems to have a doctor they are happy with.

Actually, I really like my primary care doc but she is 1.5 hours away, driving time one way, and I have to make an appointment like a month in advance. Also her office staff is horrendous AND they refused to give me my blood work unless I waited a month and came in to see her and paid another copay.

So truly she isn't the answer. I do need another doc but since nobody I know has a doc they love, I don't know where to start. What is another way to find a good doc besides asking other people??


Finding a new doctor

Postby Guest » Wed Mar 16, 2005 12:15 am

Hi there Susan,
I don't know where you live but here (Winnipeg, Canada) we are having a hard time getting in to see new Dr.s There is a big shortage. I have gotten good referrals from my family Dr. to different types of specialists (over the years) There is also a number people can call. If you are new to the city or just don't have a Dr. there is a number to call to see who is taking new patients.

Call your local College of Physicians and Surgeons (or AMA...). Maybe they can make suggestions too. I just don't know what the equivalent names for things are in the States, so sorry if it isn't the same.

I hope things will take a turn for the better for you...I have prayed and will keep it up. Have a good day. Cin-d-rella.

Postby drjudy » Thu Mar 17, 2005 10:28 am

Good question Susan. If not word-of-mouth from friends or recommendations from doctors you know (as in who would you go to or send your wife to), how do women find doctors? Here in Denver, a local magazine has a yearly issue on 'best' doctors determned by polling the medical community. I think we need a readers' choice issue as well.

I look forward to hearing from other women about how they went about the task.

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Postby colopam » Thu Mar 17, 2005 2:26 pm

I'm new to this area and I asked a few women at work, I went with the best recommendations from the women that were the most like me and my likes and dislikes, so far so good. I lucked out on our move to TN as the town we were in was VERY small but my Dr. was terrific! I REALLY lucked out on my referral to a cardiologist earlier this year and have referred some people t o him since. Good Luck!! Hugs Pam
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Postby Zero » Thu Mar 17, 2005 3:17 pm

Here's how you find menopause clinics and specialists in your area:

Now when you get there, look for the category "Organizations" and click on North American Menopause Society. Click on the "consumers" link and then on "referrals" and that will give you links according to country, city and state.

There's another link on my page under the Menopause Clinics category that has links to US, Canada and other countries too...

Hope this helps!

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