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Stupidly, I began smoking 1-3 ciggies a day

PostPosted: Fri Feb 08, 2008 9:22 pm
by menohead
After quitting not smoking for years I found my nerves jangled in the casino environment, so bummed ONLY ONE cigarette. In the past during stressful time I would buy a Nicotine substitute product instead of cigarettes. It took way longer then recommended to kick the substitute, so I don't want to go back on the merry go round. I should sever this indulgence before it becomes an addiction, as I watch my father die a horrid death from lung cancer. Also, the effects of even one cigarette on one's heart is dangerous.
Also, I think I wanted to irritate my husband, as his addiction of choice is blackjack. He loathes smoking.
But who am I truly hurting? ME!
Congratulations to all of the ladies who've managed to quit in menopause.

PostPosted: Sat Feb 09, 2008 6:51 pm
by Seventeen_At_Heart
been there menohead...I understand...after giving up for about 6 years I began again...long story...it's somewhere else on here...
glad to say I was enabled to give up again...but, to be honest, was harder the 2nd time...however...I did it!! and so can you ((hugs))).

PostPosted: Sun Feb 10, 2008 10:17 am
by minniepauz
I guess I've been lucky so far or maybe I'm just scared to tempt it, but I haven't had an urge that I couldn't resist in the 3 years since I quit.

I hope you can find something that works for you....that's the key. What worked for me (and still does) was the thought of being on an oxygen tank because I could no longer breathe... it was my usual 3rd or 4th bout of bronchitis that year and I said if I feel this miserable now, I can imagine how bad it would be to have emphysema or cancer. It took 43 years of smoking to get to that moment of "reality".

Best of luck to you.... you may have to LOOK for something that jars your brain to what YOUR reality could become. I used pictures of damaged lungs, descriptions of emphysema patients, etc. I kept thinking of my grandchildren having to help me load my oxygen tank into the car to be able to go to the zoo with them. Lots of visualization!

PostPosted: Sun Feb 10, 2008 7:28 pm
by menohead
I tossed the pack down the toilet. As my son, a former smoker stated, "he thinks it's a demon always waiting to reawaken in former smokers. Watching my wasting vegetative dad dying of lung cancer and empysema with countless tubes
twisted about him. I wanted to sneak a shot of Jack Daniels in his feeding tube. The damage was so intense that they had to resort to a pedi tube to revive him to a useless state. My mother couldn't let go, as I wanted them to let him die a natural death, as he was permanently brain damaged, but mom couldn't let go. Knowing his various vices, my sister joked, "she probably has him where she always wanted him." At this juncture, living wills weren't popular. Hmmmm, in my mom's living will she want two days to say goodbye, then ADIOS. When they warehoused him I just couldn't comprehend how the medical industry could bilk a hopeless vegetable with stage four lung cancer. Reasoning with my mother was hopeless, as we were met with the silent treatment. Living wills ladies. I concurred with a priest for moral foundation, as my father was Catholic. The priest claimed allowing one a natural death is fine, as long as
human intervention isn't used to hasten death. He made the
same decision on his mother. The day my mom had his glasses on him when he was the closest think to braindead you could get shows the depth of her denial.
Those are some intense images Dee. Takes the glamour right out of it.

PostPosted: Sun Feb 10, 2008 7:31 pm
by menohead
Oh, as Mark Twain said, "quitting's easy I've done it a thousand times." I'm stil at the dizzy stage, which is actually unenjoyable. Plus, the stench of smoke ruins the fresh smell of clean hair.

Okay, I dummed the ciggies.. Now, I have to avoid bumming one.

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 12:28 pm
by minniepauz
Are you doing ok, menohead? The reality of watching your Dad is certainly more intense than what I could imagine for myself.

What works for you? What made you throw away your cigarettes? I actually kept cigarettes here when I decided to quit and I just went hour by hour, telling myself "you're doing fine" and after the first 72 hours (when all the nicotine is out of your body), I knew I could get past the few minutes that the urge would be pulling me.

It seemed to help me to know that if I couldn't do it, the cigarettes were there. 3 years later and I still have lighters and ashtrays around (for people who want to smoke on my deck).

Whatever is the most helpful to you, that's what you should do. It doesn't really matter what someone else did to quit....unless it resonates with you. Wishing you many smoke free days ahead!!

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 1:55 pm
by menohead
Ugh, I'm quit disgusted, as I bought a pack then tossed most of them. I'm premenstrual and it ain't pretty.
I decided to get a treadmill to burn off some of this literal
confusion. How dumb!!!! I hadn't bought cigarettes in over a decade. Well, the queen of self flagellation might as well put her whip away, as that technique never worked previously.
I had horrid bouts of bronchitis in high school and a doctor actually ordered me to quit smoking. I take scores of anti-oxidants. I even feel embarassed with a cancer stick dangling out of my mouth.
Yeah, dad's death was rough. He smoked cigarettes then
decided that cigars were natural, so ended up inhaling stogies.
LOL, I noticed the Freudian slip when I said, "I dummed the cigarettes." I'm an out of sight, out of mind kind of girl, so wouldn't want them in the house. This is one of the dumber things I've done premenstrually. The period won't come down and I want to shove anything down my gullet. PMDD SUCKS.

I'm premenstrual, depressed, anxious and confused, so I'm looking for some form of oral gratification. I can't begin smoking again. I'm not actually addicted, YET, so would like to keep it that way.

Thanks for the support Dee.


Off for spring rolls and edame with my daughter then for my
annual gastroenterologist's appointment.

Good luck to all. Minute at a time.

PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 2:00 pm
by minniepauz
One last hint.....for the oral fixation. :) What worked wonders for me were LifeSavers sugar free Sorbet candies! Really different.....kind of sweet and tart at the same time. :)

Re: Stupidly, I began smoking 1-3 ciggies a day

PostPosted: Mon May 04, 2009 3:06 am
by gorgeousfluffpot
~Well menohead, good luck on quitting again. Your description of your father's death is quite harrowing and should be obligatory reading for anyone who THINKS about taking up smoking!! My mother, too, was on an oxygen cylinder at the end and kept saying to me "I've done this to myself". All heartbreaking stuff but totally unreal if you talk to a surly 18-year-old who's puffing away at a fag ... they think it's cool and it keeps you thin.
I gave up years ago, after a 20-a-day habit on strong French cigarettes (Gauloises) that can stink out a building! In fact, I was totally addicted and ignored all the health stuff but the guy I was sweet on - and who I'd been making eyes at for ages - turned to me and said that he couldn't possibly kiss me because I smelt like an ashtray. That really shocked me (not least of all because after all my silent admiration from afar it was one of the first things he said to me!). I hadn't considered that I smelt and it offended my own vanity.
So I quit. Overnight. And turned to the fridge .... well, my luscious curves (OK, OK, let's be honest - my tubby figure!) is the result of thinking: "fags or cake?" and turning to the cake. Because cake doesn't stink! It wasn't easy but, in retrospect, I smoked only because it was 'cool' at the time and all my friends were doing it.
In giving up, I have found it best to say "I don't smoke" when offered a cigarette. That's an outright NO, and nobody asks you again. But if you say "I've given up" then it opens up all the discussions and people say "oh go on, just the one won't hurt".
But, menohead, sounds like you know all that anyway. Stress makes you turn to the strangest things for comfort and distraction. You know what the consequences are and just have to keep that as your motivator. Or, like me, eat cake! At least you can lose weight, but you can't lose lung cancer!
kEEP STRONG, LADIES.