Feelings of dread, hot flashes, feel like I am losing it!

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Feelings of dread, hot flashes, feel like I am losing it!

Postby michelilow » Wed Jan 26, 2011 11:24 am

Hi,
I really hope some of you can help me with some advice please, as I feel like I am going out of my mind & imaging allsorts!
My perimenopause started when I hit forty & lasted for 7 years till eighteen months ago when I had my last period. I think I had every symptom apart from the heavy periods, which I can hopefully thank my progesterone cream for. :)
However about 9 months ago, the hot flashes started & night sweats & they have progressively got more frequent. Most days they can be intense but I may get a couple of days a month where they arent so bad. I get palpatations & anxiety.
The thing that worries me most is the thoughts of dread & doom that I get mostly right before they occur. I can wake up in a morning & the dread hits me & then the hot flash starts. My personality has changed but I thought this could be to do with me becoming a reiki healer, as I seem to be going through a type of clearing process which makes you see things clearer( I have had years of baggage to clear, which caused depression for most of my life :( ). I also feel the illness robbed me of so much, as I was so afraid to face anything.
My sex drive went completely nearly three years ago & most of the time I don't even like my husband touching me. I feel so bad about it, as we have been together since we were young teenagers. I can see how I am hurting him :( , especially when I have feeling that comes from nowhere that I should walk away from what would be seen as a perfect life. I don't no where this comes from & does scare me, as most of my life as I mentioned earlier, I have had what seemed like continous bouts of depression since being very young. I can't take antidepressants, as I was on them for years & after collapsing twice whilst on them & ending up at the emergency department. So I came off them & now rely on St Johns Wort. I did suffer with PMS in my teens & post natal depression after both my children
Would anyone please care to add any opinions, as I don't know where to turn. :? I do know I have become a much stronger person than I used to be & I know I am not suffering from depression at this time.
Michele
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Re: Feelings of dread, hot flashes, feel like I am losing it

Postby minniepauz » Thu Jan 27, 2011 8:49 am

It must be quite upsetting to be going through all this AFTER menopause, but I believe it's not uncommon as our "menopause" symptoms kind of turn into aging problems. I've been post-meno for 20 years and still have to have a fan on me when I'm sleeping (even in the winter). I still throw the covers off and then pull them back over me. I don't really have hot flashes that often but don't tolerate even mildly warm temps.....I'll be 63 in a few months.

The best advice I can give you is to embrace all the positives in your life and accept a level of discomfort that will not go away from this point on. I'm not saying this to be negative, just realistic. It does seem to help. It's good to hear that you're not depressed and you seem to really have a grasp on how to find the resources and tools you need....even reaching out like this is such a good thing. I've also battled with depression that comes and goes and I use SJW when I remember to take it! :) I've heard that meditation or yoga can help with those waves of panic and feelings of doom & gloom. You've probably noticed that they seem to come in waves so if you can train your mind to just "ride the waves" until they subside you might have more control over those times.

Thank you for sharing with us...I'm sure there are women who are experiencing the same things and will be helped by knowing they are not alone.
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Re: Feelings of dread, hot flashes, feel like I am losing it

Postby lalambert1965 » Fri Jan 28, 2011 4:32 pm

It sounds like what you have had is dysthymia. It is a low-grade depression that makes it difficult to focus and to feel like you are capable of very much. You don't have to be 'non-functioning' to be depressed. A low-dose SSRI or other anti-depressant might help.
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